[Field Notes] How to Let Go
“Not everything that falls apart is a failure. Sometimes, it’s a filter.” - Mel Robbins
This book is absolutely everywhere. It’s the Adidas Sambas of the self-help space—trendy, ubiquitous, and a little overhyped. Which is usually enough to make me run.
But in an effort to better understand what’s resonating in the space, I picked this one up.
And I get it.
It’s simple. It’s practical. Mel writes like the aunt at your kitchen island giving it to you straight.
If you’re someone who holds life with a tight grip, this book will absolutely help you loosen it.
The premise is simple:
If someone shows you who they are—let them.
If they misunderstand you, undervalue you, overstep—let them.
You can’t control people or outcomes. So let them be. Get one step closer to the truth. And then choose what you do next.
Here’s what stood out:
Let the misunderstanding be the mirror.
So much of our stress comes from trying to manage how we’re seen. But the truth is: how someone sees you says more about them than it does about you. Let them be wrong. Let it sting. Let it show you where you still seek validation. And then let it go.
Let the people you love struggle.
Helping feels loving—slipping them money, rewriting the resume, solving the problem. But that’s not always love.
Sometimes it’s control.
When you jump in to rescue, you’re putting a Band-Aid on a wound that’s asking to be healed.
Let them wrestle. Let them find their own strength. That’s how self-worth is built.
Let go to make room.
If someone walks away, stop chasing. If something doesn’t work out, stop holding on. If life redirects you, stop resisting.
The faster you let go, the faster you get to clarity.
Let them / it go. So you can get back to you.
This book reminded me of something I’ve been coming back to in my own life.
My mantra this year has been “closer to the truth.”
Every time something doesn’t go the way I hoped—when a plan shifts, a door closes, or tension rises—I’ve been asking myself: what truth is this pointing me to?
Not in a silver-lining, everything-happens-for-a-reason kind of way. But in a grounded, clarity-is-a-gift kind of way.
Even disappointment can be directional. Even discomfort can be a compass.
When something falls away, I don’t see it as failure. I see it as refinement.
And that gets me one step closer to the life that’s actually mine.
Final thought:
You don’t have to fight to be understood.
You don’t have to beg to be valued.
Let them.
And then choose peace, choose clarity, choose you.
Till next time,
Diaundra
This was right on time! Thanks for sharing this!